Am I worthy?

It took six very short months and here I am, just a few days removed from my first meeting as a board member on the county’s sports hall of fame.

To be honest, I still have mixed feelings. And it stems from one baseline question – Why?

Why me? Why now? Why not someone else?

Only two other times was I invited to be a member of a local board, and in both of those instances I accepted. I was a member of the Thumb Big Brothers Big Sisters board for roughly eight months.

And, before I could even take a place on the board of the Thumb Meet of Champion, I had to then decline after we moved to Wisconsin.

I never was asked to be on any such board in Wisconsin.

So, here we are, less than a few months into this stint here in Ludington and I’m on a board.

It’s something I revere. It’s something I have the utmost respect for.

Which is why I don’t feel I’ve earned it. I haven’t earned it as a person.

Part of me believes it has something to do with the position that I hold. Because of my job, I have some insight into the current student athletes, thus making the board’s job easier when it comes to selecting student-athletes of the year.

And, because of my job, perhaps I’m viewed as integral into getting the word out and without me on the board, maybe I wouldn’t buy into the publicity of the board without the position.

People have been complimentary to the work I’ve done. People have seen the passion I bring to covering community sports. They’re beginning to understand that I will do nearly anything in my fiber to do a good job. It’s damn near cost me my family in the past and it’s one of the rotten things about me.

The designs, the photos, the stories, the online experience – it’s all coming to fruition before people’s eyes.

I’ve long said give me a year. Give me a year to go through everything can be gone through. A year to learn all of the kids, the programs, the schools, the coaches, the newspaper, the people, the expectations.

When I was first asked to join the board, I didn’t immediately say, “yes.”

I talked with my wife. I talked with my predecessor.

And I accepted.

But I still have doubts. I have doubts not in my ability. I have doubts in my acceptance.

I don’t think I’ve earned a chair at the big kids’ table yet. I’m just not there, at least not in my mind.

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